Updated on: Feb 18, 2024
Gifts can be a sensitive issue, but they become even more sensitive if they are for a special occasion such as a bridal shower gift vs wedding gift. In short, the answer is yes, you should give a gift for both the bridal shower and the wedding. Let’s discuss a few questions to help your understanding of a bridal shower gift vs wedding gift.
Bridal Shower Gift vs Wedding Gift Q&A
Is a gift necessary for both the bridal shower and the wedding?
Yes, gift etiquette states that, out of a bridal shower gift vs wedding gift, a gift is necessary for both events. However, you don’t have to send the same amount of money for both gifts. Bridal shower gift ideas tend to be smaller and cheaper - ranging between $25 and $75 - compared to wedding gifts which cost from $75 to $200. If you are going to the wedding with a plus one, you should consider giving a bigger wedding gift that covers both meals.
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How much should I spend?
Traditional wedding etiquettes mention that the gifts should cost at least the amount of food and drinks you are served at the wedding. It is a big boundary since some weddings don’t serve meals at all, while others have buffets or course meals with cocktail hours. To be safe, you can choose a gift from the couple’s registry. If you are good friends with the couple, you’ll know better than anyone about what they need.
How to decide the cost of the bridal shower gift vs wedding gift?
The 20-20-60 rule is a great one to keep in mind when you are confused about how much to spend on gifts. First, set a budget for all the gifts. Then, spend 20% on the bridal shower gift, 20% on the engagement party gift, and the remaining 60% on the wedding gift.
For example, if your budget is $200, spend $40 each on the engagement party and the bridal shower gift and $120 on the wedding gift. Keep in mind that this rule is for those who are invited to all three events. If you are invited to only the wedding, there is no need for you to give a gift for the other events. You can spend your budget solely on the wedding gift. If you are invited to a bridal shower and the wedding, split the costs into 30-70 or 40-60 - whichever works better for you.
Do I have to buy a gift from the couple’s registry?
This is a controversial question. Some people strongly agree while others don’t. If you are good friends of the couple but are not their best friends, be safe and choose a gift from the registry. If you have known the couple for a long time and are like a family to them, the rule is more flexible. You will know what they need and want that is not on the registry. In this case, go for it! They will be grateful that you knew what they would appreciate the most.
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Can I give one big gift for both events?
This is not the typical scenario, but it might be acceptable if it covers the cost for both events and if you let the couple know beforehand. For example, if you are buying them a brand new refrigerator, it would be acceptable to give one gift for both events, but be sure to tell them either in person or with a cute card.
Should I give the gifts in-person or ship them?
Gift unboxing is a big event in bridal showers, so it will be better to take them to the shower. However, if the gift is too big or too heavy for you to handle, ask the bride or couple beforehand for their understanding.
When it comes to weddings, it doesn’t matter that much, but it might be better to send it to them. There is already a lot going on on the day of the wedding. If you ship it directly to their home, that is one less worry for the couple.
Are bridal shower gifts for the bride or the couple?
Either one is acceptable. If you are a close friend of the bride and want to give her a personal gift, the bridal shower is the perfect opportunity to do so since wedding gifts tend to be for both the bride and the groom.
When should I give the bridal shower gift vs wedding gift?
If you are giving it to them in person, stick to the plan. If there is a present-giving time, for example before the dinner, that’s when you should give it to them. If you are shipping the gift, you can either send it before the wedding, the same day, or even afterward. Just don’t forget that it is best to give the gift before the 1st wedding anniversary comes around!
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Are there any recommendations for gifts?
Sure! Below are some recommendations for all three events - engagement parties, bridal showers, and weddings.
Engagement Party
- Cookbooks
- Chocolates
- Wine or champagne
- Gift cards
Bridal Showers
- Cookware and bakeware sets
- Bedding sets
- Dinnerware sets
- Couple pajamas
- Cake serving sets for the wedding
Wedding
- Gifts from the registry
- Kitchen appliances
- Dutch ovens
- Coffee makers
- Microwave
- Gift cards
Bridal Shower Gift vs Wedding Gift: Conclusion
I hope these answered all of your questions regarding a bridal shower gift vs wedding gift, along with other questions. Check out our multiple checklists and budgets on our website. Wish the best of luck to the couple and don’t forget to enjoy yourself as well! We partner with various affiliate sites, like Amazon, from time to time to assist our users in planning their events more quickly.
Written by Grace Kwon