Updated on: Feb 23, 2024
Got a wedding coming up, a bridal party, and an invitation to being the best man to the groom, but not sure what the role and duties entail? This guide will help you prepare to be the best man and inform you of what you can expect in the role, including all the best man responsibilities and duties. Similarly to the role of the maid of honor, the best man is as important and has more responsibilities to take on than a groomsman. If you are looking for ideas for your wedding or to stay organized planning one, our wedding task list is a great resource to check out.
Best Man Responsibilities - Before the Wedding
1. Advisor
The groom chose you as the best man for a reason, so keep your ears open and see what he needs! As his best friend or one of his trusted people, the groom will need you to be his shoulder to lean on when times get hard. With all the wedding planning, the groom trusts you to be by his side and act as his advisor as one of the main responsibilities to help him make some important decisions and take on some tasks to relieve some stress off the groom’s shoulders since wedding planning can be stressful.
Some tasks may include choosing the groom’s outfits, the bachelor party, coordinating his honeymoon, and making sure the groomsmen know their responsibilities and duties on the day of the wedding. Keep the groom on track, be supportive, be his emotional support, and help him get on his best foot forward.
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2. Plan and Organize the Bachelor Party
One of the most important responsibilities for the best man to throw is the unforgettable Bachelor Party to celebrate the remaining time before the groom becomes married. As the special chosen one by the groom who is your best friend, relative, or as the closest trusted person, the groom knows that you won’t let them down.
Think about the groom’s preferences, his style, and serve his best interests for a weekend getaway whether it's throwing a party on a yacht, at a strip club, having a sports tournament, bar crawling, spending time outdoors, or going on a road trip, but whatever you choose to plan, the groom will surely be looking forward to this time of his life! Make sure to double-check that the groom will approve.
Once you figure out the location, reserve the date and time, send out the invitations to the groomsmen, and help your groom have the best time of his life. Planning a bachelor party is huge, but don’t forget to get the other groomsmen to help make this event come true.
3. Giving a Gift to the Groom
Although attendees of the wedding traditionally give the newlyweds a wedding gift, the best man is not required to give the groom a gift. It is nice to give the groom something special if you decide to and it could be something that adds a meaning which could be as simple as personalized engraved wine bottles or as extravagant as a nice luxury watch. The groomsmen could also pitch in to get a gift for the groom to show their appreciation and support. No matter what you decide, your groom will love the gift, think of how thoughtful and supportive you are for the couple.
4. Wedding Formalwear Fittings
The groom has to look his best on the day of the wedding and this is where the best man will come in as well. The best man is responsible for helping the groom choose an outfit that he’ll walk down the aisle in. If the couple decided on a certain look that the groom should dress in, consider that when selecting the groom’s outfit. Schedule fittings with the groom and groomsmen to help with choosing the color of the formalwear and the material. Once the groom’s outfit is chosen, the best man has to make arrangements in whether the groom chooses to buy or rent a suit.
The best man is also in charge of coordinating the groomsmen’s formalwear attire and possibly placing a group order of attire for the groomsmen. Speak with the groom to see if he would prefer the groomsmen to all match with the same outfit or coordinate with a color. It is optional for the groomsmen's attire to match the bridesmaid dresses. Lastly, don’t forget to get measured for your tuxedo or suit and decide if you would rather rent or buy it. Depending on the groom, he may pitch in for the men’s attire or they are each responsible for the cost of their outfit. Once you pick your outfit, choose a pair of fun socks to go with it!
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5. Wedding & Dinner Rehearsals
The best man is expected to take part in the wedding ceremony rehearsal and the dinner rehearsal to make sure the real thing will go smoothly and spotless the day of. Both of the rehearsals will most likely take place the day before the wedding. They are to help everyone be aware of what their role is in the wedding and during the reception to ensure everyone knows where they are placed. There will be instructions for each person on what their role is, what to say, and where their spot is. During the rehearsal dinner, it’s your chance to meet the rest of the couple’s family and extended family as well as exchange some hellos.
6. Write your Best Man Speech
Traditionally, the best man’s speech will be right up after the groom’s speech. Plan ahead of time and brainstorm some ideas on paper to get your creative juices flowing. Go down memory lane and come up with something sweet to say about the couple’s relationship. Move away from embarrassing stories and instead, keep the speech classy for a night to remember. Be positive, wish the newlywed happiness in their marriage, and congratulate them. No matter what you plan on saying, the groom will be thankful that you’ve been there for him all the time!
Best Man Responsibilities - During the Wedding
7. Be the Right Hand Man
The big day has come and your groom will need you to be by his side all the time to assist him with anything he may need. Throughout the whole wedding process, before, during, and after the wedding, you’ll act as his advisor, best friend, and his right-hand man as his aide. He’s nervous that it’s his big day and you’d want to make this day as perfect as it can be for him.
Everything needs to be in place and all set for the ceremony to begin. Check in with the wedding planner that everything is set, that the groomsmen are ready, see if the groom is ready, and accompany him to the chapel early, and then it’s showtime when all the pieces are set in stone. Once everything’s all set, attend the wedding procession and walk the maid of honor down the aisle.
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8. Rings
The best man is entrusted with keeping the rings safe and sound by the groom until the time comes to hand them over to the couple when they exchange their vows and say “I Do.” Keep an eye on the rings and know where they are placed if you set them down somewhere. You must know where the rings are at all times and it will be an unpleasant situation if the rings happen to be lost.
9. Collect Wedding Gifts
The best man may be needed to assist with collecting wedding gifts depending on the wedding set-up and possibly store the gifts at a certain location. If you are asked to help with the gifts, collect them all in one place to make it easy for the guests and the couple. You may be placed in charge of transporting the gifts from the reception to the newlywed’s home after the end of the wedding.
10. Marriage License
For a marriage license to be signed and official, there need to be two witnesses for this to happen. Usually, it’s the duty of the maid of honor and the best man to serve as the legal two witnesses by watching the couple sign their marriage license for it to be official. Keep a pen handy in case the groom needs one and be on standby if you are also required to sign it as well.
11. Best Man Speech & Toasts
During the reception, you’ve been waiting for this moment - to share the best man speech with the crowd that you’ve long prepared for and to send off the newlywed with toasts.
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12. Keep the Guests Engaged
Direct the guests to the reception location and entertain them while the groom and the bride are in the middle of changing their outfits for the next event - the reception. Make sure that the guests can find their way there and that they are ready to continue the celebration to welcome the newlyweds with open arms. Mingle with the guests and check in with them to see if they’re having a good time so far to keep the guests happy.
Best Man Responsibilities - After the Wedding
13. Vendors
With the big event coming to an end, check in with the vendors to ensure that these expenses have been paid off and if they aren’t, be sure to organize this for the groom.
14. The Getaway Car
Coordinate the newlywed’s transportation to get them to their next destination for their honeymoon. Decorate and personalize their getaway car by tying some cans with string to the back of the car, add balloons, and write on the car windows with some paint only if they did not rent any mode of transportation beforehand.
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15. Return the Groom’s Tux
After the wedding, it’s important to take care of the groom’s tuxedo right away, especially if the newlyweds are taking a trip and going on their honeymoon. Be sure to send the tuxedo to the cleaners. If the groom rented a tuxedo or borrowed one, make sure to help him return it in good condition, so he has one less thing off his mind.
Best Man Responsibilities: Conclusion
The best man has a very important role as the right-hand man for the groom. As the best man, it’s no simple task for the groom himself, he’ll need all the help he can get, and a lot of effort is required to get the job done. Getting a head start and knowing what to expect, you’re on to a great start to being the best man to your groom. We hope this guide helps you understand the best man responsibilities and duties that it takes to be the best man ever.
Written by Stephanie Tse